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do i dare or do i dare? [userpic]

Destiny

October 29th, 2006 (02:29 pm)
bouncy

feeling: bouncy

Title:  Destiny

Author: faye_dartmouth

Summary: Dean finds a reason to fight. A missing scene from Simon Says.

A/N: This one is for Sunrize, who I promised at the SFTCOL(AR)S forum that I would write this piece. I now believe she owes me a fic, but we'll see what happens :) This is an attempt to gratify the potential limp factor of the ep while also explaining why on earth Sam just lay there at the end of the ep. Beta'ed by geminigrl11, as usual, so all brilliance is due to her.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, never did, never will.

Destiny

His head hurt.

No, scratch that. His head didn't hurt. His head throbbed, agonizingly, pulsating with a sharp pain that jackknifed through his skull so hard his vision blurred.

He blinked and realized that maybe that was just the concrete mere inches from his face.

He was...lying down? Taking a nap on the pavement?

Then he heard the voices, somewhere barely over the sound of his own heart in his ears.

"...you call them up, go out for a drink..."

Why did he know that voice? Think, Sam, think. It was important--more important than the grittiness of the ground beneath his hands.

"The man with the yellow eyes..."

Sam's stomach turned violently. The Demon.

His memory came trickling back in waves of urgency. He had to get up, had to help, had to stop this from getting any worse. Andy, Webber, the girl--what was her name? ...and where was Dean?

Sam struggled to push himself up, but light exploded behind his eyes and he blinked blindly.

His eyes were unseeing, but in his vision, he saw everything, everything he didn't want to see, and his muddied brain struggled to keep up with it. The girl dying, Andy screaming, his brother, a gunshot--

Oh, God.

But Sam couldn't stop it, he hadn't stopped any of it, and the more he fought, the weaker he became, until he was kissing the pavement once more.

ooo

Never point a gun at something you don't want to kill.

His father had told him that countless times. Guns weren't toys after all, but it wasn't as if John Winchester could keep his sons away from weaponry, not with all the danger they faced.

Gun training had started early. By the time Dean was nine, he was a better shot than most men, and it earned him the right to stay home alone with Sammy in his care, the rifle always nearby if needed.

He'd been a rambunctious kid, and once when they were staying in a decrepit farm house, Dean had taken aim at stray cat.

He shouldn't have been surprised that he nailed it, but when his father found the carcass in the yard, John had given Dean quite a lecture.

"You don't waste bullets, and you don't get used to shooting things that shouldn't be shot."

Even hunting had its rules.

When Sam was 10, he'd joked about shooting Dean in the foot and his father had grounded him for three weeks.

So needless to say, Dean didn't point guns at things he didn't want to kill.

He wanted to kill Webber.

He didn't know why the kid was evil, while Andy was relatively harmless, but at this point, Dean wasn't sure it matter. Webber was evil, and they hunted evil--even Sam agreed on that point. He didn't know how he'd incapacitated Sam, but there his brother was, sprawled on the ground, with Andy and Webber arguing loudly while the girl cried in the background.

He'd been out of the action long enough. He understood why Sam had asked him to stay back, but things were different now, and Dean wasn't about to trust his brother's life to some untrained kid and a psychotic mind-controlling killer. If he could just keep out of sight, keep out of range, then Webber would have no power over him.

He was wrong.

It wasn't the first time, but this time might well be the last.

When he found the barrel of the gun pointed at his own chin, his finger trembling on the trigger, he knew he could pull it. Because he never pointed his gun at things he didn't want to kill.

What's dead, should stay dead.

It was all wrong, too wrong, but it would be all right.

He couldn't stop it, even if he wanted to, and at this point, he wasn't sure. And the voice kept saying it would be okay.

A gunshot shattered the night.

ooo

Dean thought he was dead.

He was pretty sure the shot had blown the back of his head off.

He was pretty sure there was no way he could have survived that.

Then he breathed.

He wasn't dead.

The back of his head seemed rather intact.

He dropped the gun, half shocked, half disgusted. Telepathy. The damn kid could control minds telepathically.

Anger and embarrassment washed through him. He'd been mind-raped--again. He'd never been envious of Sam's abilities, but he sure as hell wished he could pick up some of that immunity Sam seemed to have.

Sam.

Dean suddenly remembered why he'd had the gun in the first place.

Scrambling to his feet, Dean stumbled out of the brush and toward the road.

There were two bodies on the ground.

A strangled cry left his throat as he ran to the taller of the two forms. "Sam?"

Falling to his knees, he tried to focus. Sam was on his stomach, head turned away from Dean, and Dean could see darkening bruises on the back of Sam's neck.

Fingers trembling, Dean reached out, relieved to find a strong and steady pulse.

Carefully, Dean rolled Sam, who moved without resistance into Dean's arms. He pulled Sam into his lap, willing his kid brother to wake up. "Sam," he coaxed, his fingers on Sam's face. "Give me a sign that you're in there."

There was no response.

Dean cursed.

"Is he okay?"

It was Andy, and Dean finally remembered the rest of the situation. The younger boy was staring at him, and Dean could see shades of terror and confusion washing over him as he stood trembling, the gun lax in his hands, pointed toward the ground. Dean recognized something in Andy's shell-shocked appearance--something he had seen from the first moment he'd met the kid. There was something pure about him; even in his deceit, he was innocent.

Or had been innocent.

Dean could see the look in his eyes and he knew that Andy would never outlive that sensation of pulling the trigger, of killing his own brother.

Swallowing hard against it, Dean averted his eyes.

Then he looked to Webber, bleeding on the ground, from a bullet that had saved Dean's life. He supposed that Anson Weems had been innocent once too. Lying on the ground, still now in death, he just looked like another kid, a little too much like Andy, a little too much like Sam.

Power had been Webber's downfall, and that scared Dean, because he had seen Sam's power too. And it certainly seemed as if the man with the yellow eyes could get to anyone, anywhere, whenever and however he wanted to, and Dean wasn't sure he'd always be able to protect Sam against that.

Then he looked at Sam, still limp in his arms, eyes closed against the world, and Dean didn't know where his kid brother fit in. Sam's visions were getting stronger, more frequent, though Sam still had no control over them. Except for one bout of telekinesis, Sam hadn't shown any signs that he could control anything, much less use his powers for evil like Webber or Max, or even for self-gratification like Andy.

But the Demon said it has plans for Sam, and had stalked his kid brother in the most terrifying ways. Dean wondered how long they could hold out. How long Sam could keep the visions from manifesting more and stronger. They already used the visions to save people--and Dean knew that the more they used them, the more Sam experienced them, the more powerful Sam would become in using them.

What if Sam learned to focus, to turn them on and off? What if he learned to predict the future with enough precision to change it?

It would be a weapon that could be used to defeat anything, maybe even defeat the Demon--but Dean wondered if the Demon would use it to defeat them.

Dean could never envision Sam becoming like Max or Webber. Sam was no killer. Of that, Dean was sure.

But for the first time, after hunting 22 years, all the signs were telling them that the Demon was getting stronger. He was getting to more people in more places, and he had his eyes on Sam. No matter what Dean told Sam, he was pretty sure that he didn't have a clue how to protect Sam from whatever the Demon had in store for him.

Sam may not be swayed by dreams of a man with yellow eyes, but their time in the cabin had taught them all that the Demon had other techniques of persuasion.

With a sigh, Dean looked back at Andy, who still waited expectantly for an answer. "Yeah, I think he's okay."

Andy nodded absently, then seemed to shudder as his eyes drifted back to Webber. "I killed him."

Dean could hear the sounds of shock in Andy's voice, and tried to remember a time when he had felt that way.

He couldn't.

But he could remember Sam, the first time he killed, even though it had been something evil. Sam's voice had shaken with that same uncertainty and fear.

It was the same tone he used now when he talked about being a murderer.

Andy killed for self-defense. Webber killed for his own benefit.

Sam--Sam was somewhere in between.

He sighed. Andy was just staring at him, clearly waiting for direction. Then Dean remembered the girl as well. Webber was dead, but none of them were okay, and Dean didn't want to muster the energy to take charge of this anymore.

Dean cradled Sam closer, wishing his brother would wake up. It was their policy to run as soon as possible, and he knew Sam had taken far worse beatings, but Dean wasn't sure he cared anymore. After all, he had no one else to answer to, no one else's orders to follow. It was just him, and his unconscious brother, and this awful sense that something worse was coming for them all.

"Go take care of Tracy," Dean ordered, his voice thick. "I'll take care of this."

ooo

Dean had taken care of things all his life, so, despite how tired he felt, how much his head hurt, it came like second nature. Gently, he laid Sam down, rolling him on his side to better inspect the damage.

The sun was beginning to rise, and Dean could hear Andy talking softly in the distance. The dawn made the red welts on the bad of Sam's neck more visible, and the blood on the base of his skull looked dark crimson.

There was a gash just at Sam's hairline, and Dean figured that was the point of contact that had done Sam in. He fingered the wounds gently, and deduced that Sam would have a headache, but that he'd be okay.

Satisfied, he rolled Sam back onto his back and set to rousing his brother. Tapping Sam's face, he called, "Time to wake up. Come on, Sammy. Wake up now."

Sam grunted, scrunching his nose in annoyance as he tried to roll away from Dean's touch.

"That's it. I knew you were faking this whole unconsciousness thing."

Sam's eyelids fluttered before finally opening. "Dean?"

Dean grinned. "Yep. It's about time you woke up. You missed all the fun."

Either Sam's head hurt too much or he was too tired, but he didn't respond to Dean's joking. He struggled to move, apparently trying to prop himself up.

"Careful," Dean ordered.

"It's just a knock on the head," Sam said, pushing himself up on his elbows.

Dean glared, placing a restraining hand on Sam's shoulder before he could raise himself any farther. "I think we've enough coma problems recently. So just take it easy."

Memory darkened Sam's face and he stopped resisting Dean's hands. "Webber?"

"He's dead."

Sam's eyes widened. "What happened?" he asked, his body unconsciously pushing upwards.

Dean guided Sam gently into a seated position. "Andy shot him."

"Andy?"

"Yeah."

Pain radiated through Sam's body and he tried to focus through it. "But why? What happened?"

"What do you remember?" Dean asked, concern tingeing his voice.

Sam grimaced. "Trying to tie Webber up," he said. "We taped his mouth."

"Too bad mind-control boy could do it telepathically," Dean quipped.

"Telepathically?"

"Yep, made the girl whack you upside the head."

Sam frowned and winced. "I don't remember that part."

"You were kind of unconscious, so I wouldn't think so."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Wait, how would you know? Weren't you supposed to wait by the car? So he couldn't get to you?"

Dean stifled a groan. He'd been hoping the stick to the head would have addled Sam's logic enough so he wouldn't put those facts together. "I wasn't just going to sit around and trust your life to Andy. I mean, I like the kid and all, but it's not like he's trained for this stuff."

"But you said it was Andy who killed Webber."

Dean shifted uncomfortably. "Webber may have used his mind control thing on me just a little."

Sam's eyes widened again, this time a tinge of panic coloring them. "What?"

With a sigh, Dean finally said, "I was going to take him out. I was in the bushes--I didn't know he could do it telepathically. Next thing I know, I'm pointing it at my chin."

Sam blanched.

"That's when Andy stopped him." Dean tried to sound casual. "And we're all fine, except for, you know, Webber, and you, who apparently does not have as hard of a head as we once thought."

The humor was lost on Sam. "I should have stopped this."

"You were unconscious."

Sam wasn't about to be reasoned with. He shook his head. "You almost died. Again. That's not something I'm okay with."

"Well, I didn't."

"No thanks to me," Sam said, casting his gaze downward.

"Sam...come on. You can't control this kind of stuff."

"Maybe I could. I mean, Webber, Max, even Andy--they learned to control their powers."

"Yeah, and two of them wound up dead because of it. Your powers are bad enough without you trying to hone in on them."

"Dean, you don't get it do you? I have a responsibility. To you."

Dean's breath caught in his throat. "What are you talking about?"

"You're my brother and you've given up everything for me, pulled me from the fire more times than I can count. And yet somehow when push comes to shove, I'm never able to save you."

"That's not true."

"In the cabin. I couldn't save you there and look what happened. And in the hospital--I couldn't do it their either and Dad died because I failed. Tonight--it was Andy, not me."

Dean's heart pounded and his palms grew clammy. "You've saved me before, Sam. Like with the scarecrow in Indiana. Or the time I nearly died from a heart attack. That was all you."

"That was a reaper bound by black magic. I just got lucky. And if I hadn't left you in the first place, the scarecrow never would have been a problem."

"Just stop it, okay?" Dean insisted harshly, sitting back on his heels, his mind reeling.

Sam fell quiet for a moment. "I just...," he began, his voice soft, broken. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

There were tears in Sam's voice and Dean felt himself go numb.

"I know you say it's not natural for you to be alive, but there's nothing natural about our lives. There never has been. And you deserve to live. More than anyone. Especially more than me. Because how long, Dean--how long until I become the things we hunt? How long until the Demon comes back and takes what he's been staking out since I was six months old? And if I can't save you for the simple things, how will I ever save you from myself?"

Dean's eyes stung and he couldn't catch his breath. He shook his head, and looked away, denial surging through him. "Sam, it's not like that--"

Dean was cut off by the abrupt sound of Sam throwing up.

Dean's shock dissipated as he turned hurriedly back to his brother's side, grasping his shoulders. "Easy, Sammy," he cooed gently. "Breathe through it."

The retching left Sam spent, and he would have collapsed to the ground again without Dean's strong grip holding him up.

Dean arranged Sam against his chest, letting his kid brother's head loll against his shoulder while they both panted to regain their senses. Sam's mind was befuddled by a head injury and a string of guilt that Dean had never comprehended, and Dean as conflicted with the burden of a life he didn't think he deserved but knew it was his duty to cling to.

Maybe it had been his time to die, maybe that had been his destiny.

But maybe Sam was supposed to be a killer, using his powers for evil.

That was a destiny Dean would always fight against. And if that meant defying his own in the process--well, that was a price Dean realized he might be willing to pay.

Sam was pushing away, trying to sit up of his own volition. He was shaky, but he seemed to find an equilibrium and sat facing his brother.

"I'm sorry, Dean," Sam said quietly. "I don't know how to make any of this better."

Dean clenched his teeth and forced a humorless laugh. "Shut up. Your head wound is making you all girly."

Sam seemed to sigh, and for a moment, he looked like he was about to say something else. But then he laughed and met Dean's eyes with a smile. "Least I have an excuse--what's yours?"

"Don't want everyone to think I'm heartless. You have been getting yourself clocked a lot lately."

Fingering the back of his head, Sam winced. "Sticked and phoned, actually. Let's not give anyone any ideas."

"At least it beats that choking thing you had going last year."

"Still better than getting thrown into walls as much as you do."

Dean grinned at that. His back had taken more than its share of bruises of the last year.

He dragged Sam to his feet. The morning had broken, clear and crisp on the horizon, and the sunlight illuminated the scene--Andy and Tracy, Webber's body--and another terrifying piece of the Demon's puzzle.

He clasped Sam on the shoulder, squeezing a little when Sam swayed. "What can I say, Sammy? Chicks dig scars."

Sam steadied, straightening to his full height. His eyes lightened, and the pain seemed to ease from his face. "We're going to have to get our story straight with Andy and Tracy."

Dean shrugged. "Somehow I don't think it's going to be a problem getting the cops to believe anything we decide."

Sam snorted. "Probably not."

There was a pause, and both brothers looked out at the scene before them, a macabre reminder of just what danger there was, of just how lucky they were. Andy and Webber had never had the chance to connect, to know each other, and in their separation, the Demon had managed to push both of them to their limits. Sam didn't know where he'd be without his brother, and Dean didn't know how far he'd go for his brother, and neither wanted to find out.

But that was all speculation, the future. There were still things to take care of in the here and now, first of which was his brother's head wound. He reached out and felt the knot on the back of Sam's head.

Sam flinched away with a curse.

"That hurt?"

Sam glared at him. "Only when you touch it."

"Wimp."

Sam shook his head and chuckled in disbelief. "You're impossible."

"You ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Sam replied with an easy shrug of his shoulders.

The grin on Dean's face spread naturally. They would never be ready for what was to come, just as they hadn't been ready for anything that had happened. But he and Sam were together now--together and alive--and somehow that was all he needed, all Sam needed to fight the burden of destiny that loomed before them.

Comments

Posted by: Shaina (lady_shain)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 08:45 pm (UTC)

I loved Sam's fears here; and giving Dean the one thing that might get him past the whole 'Dad traded his life for mine' thing.

Great Job, thanks for sharing!

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 01:57 am (UTC)

I started this one as a pure missing scene, but the more I wrote, the more it became a tag to the ideas from the end of CSPWDT. It's kind of neat how the eps flow together and build on one another.

Thanks for reading!

Posted by: Shaina (lady_shain)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 03:15 am (UTC)

..so glad it did. The boys and their storyline are so compelling; and if Kripke isn't gonna give Dean a reason to live; to fight; to accept then we will. *g*

Posted by: You shouldn't let poets lie to you (kroki_refur)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 09:26 pm (UTC)
brain

Aw, Sam's head hurts! Poor Sam.

I love how you managed to make this whole thing seem so situated in the story-line so far, bringing in Dean's guilt from the end of 2x04 and Sam's fears about the demon, fitting it all in perfectly and giving us explanations for stuff like why the hell was Sam lying around on the ground anyway?

"Don't want everyone to think I'm heartless. You have been getting yourself clocked a lot lately."

Fingering the back of his head, Sam winced. "Sticked and phoned, actually. Let's not give anyone any ideas."


I am now waiting impatiently for the episode where someone hits Sam with a clock. Though I would settle for a return of the choking.

Anyway, good job! Perfect blend of angst and limpness, with a nice touch of humour at the end. Loved it.

*uses appropriate icon*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 01:59 am (UTC)

I didn't really mean to make this so related to the storyline so far...it just sort of happened as I was writing it. This was one of those rare pieces that just flowed for me without tons of struggling or thought or whining. Usually I'm insufferable when I write fic, but this one was relatively painless. My beta appreciated that, I'm sure :)

LOL! Poor Sam's head. Sounds like a fic idea...you interested?

But I do miss the choking. I liked when Sam's neck was attacked. I'm hoping they bring it back again. Maybe one of these times someone/thing will be successful and we'll get a CPR scene.

:)

Posted by: You shouldn't let poets lie to you (kroki_refur)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 11:34 am (UTC)
brain

Excellent! Flowing is good, whining less so. Good for gem is good for all of us, right?

Ha! Much as I think Sam's head/clock might be my new OTP, I still haven't written my fic for marishna's picture prompt thing, plus I think if I take time off from But for the Grace to write clock!fic, certain people might be annoyed at me. So how about you, huh, huh? *puppy dog eyes*

Sam's neck was attacked this week! I choose to believe that neck bruising from bits of wood is a prelude to extensive choking next week. With bonus CPR. It's going to happen, I can feel it. *attempts to mid-control Kripke*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: November 1st, 2006 03:24 am (UTC)

Dude. You should SO write the clock fic. Someday. I'm patient. Mostly...

Well, maybe not. But you could so do the clocking of Sam justice. I can beg. Or bribe. Or just pester...

But yeah, you do need to finish your other fic. What about multitasking? Just writing more?

LOL! You are desperate for Sam's neck to be in peril, I see. But it was bruising on his neck at the end of that ep, and there did seem to be a paramedic checking him out. So maybe they're just working up to the full on choking.

Wouldn't it be great if you did have the power of mind control? All the things you'd make Kripke do...and the pain you'd inflict on Sam. Though the first thing would be to give poor Sam a seizure...wouldn't it? :)

Posted by: You shouldn't let poets lie to you (kroki_refur)
Posted at: November 1st, 2006 03:03 pm (UTC)
supernatural

You're right. Sam must be clocked. I shall put it in the back of my mind and see what happens...

Desperate is right. Kripke totally teased me by having so much choking last season and then none so far this season. I think I might be developing a Sam/strangulation kink to accompany the seizure thing. (Can you get seizures from being strangled? I like to imagine you can.)

If I had the power of mind control, I think I would have a long running seizure disorder (linked to visions, yay!) which would culminate in a two-part episode involving strangulation -> vision -> seizure -> intubation (or another combination thereof). Then I would probably die of joy, and Kripke would have to think up story-lines for himself again.

*thinks very hard about choking!Sam and stares in direction of Vancouver*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: November 1st, 2006 11:20 pm (UTC)

I will be sure to remind you of the clocking of Sam if you should forget...

Seizures from being strangled...that would be fun, but I have no idea if it has medical basis. But maybe it can all be some supernatural doing. That's what great about a supnernaturally based show--there's so much possibility for creative limpness.

Long running seizure disorder! You are CRUEL, in the best way. Did you ever read the one by a-blackwinged-bird at ff.net? It's not like really exciting seizures, by Sam's visions are explained as seizures.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2964042/1/

Bet you would love an epileptic Sam. Something where his visions get worse to the point where they do cause convulsions. Even better if he stops breathing during them, requiring intubation.

Yes. I think that would work :)

*sigh* Why can't Kripke ever do somethign like that.

LOL! I'd try that, but I have no sense of direction and would never look correctly at Vancouver.

Posted by: a rearranger of the proverbial bookshelf (embroiderama)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 09:55 pm (UTC)
Sam - looking down

I was wondering about Sam sitting there with Dean and the EMT. Thank you for making it all clear! *g* This is lovely.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:00 am (UTC)
Sam

Glad this makes sense to fill the gap. Sam was so random, lying there on the ground, doing nothing.

Thanks :)

Posted by: kaly (kalyw)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 10:31 pm (UTC)
sam&dean_2

Nice addition to the episode. The little reunion scenes like this are the ones we always seem to miss out on, in favor or rushing things to their conclusion so it's up to fic to fill in the holes. Good job. :)

And I miss Thursday being strangle Sammy day. ;) He's not been strangled all season! *g*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:02 am (UTC)
zonked

I love your icon.

If Gem were here, she'd start singing...

Fortunately, I am not Gem.

:)

And the resolutions are incredibly rushed! Drives me crazy. That's what makes the boys seem really unable to talk--all the good opportunities to seem lost in a commercial break. But it's sure making me write a lot...

It's still early...maybe Sam will get strangled yet. We can hope :)

Posted by: kaly (kalyw)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:25 am (UTC)
sam&dean_2

Heh. I've loved that song since college and it's been nothing but the boys to me since last fall when someone made a vid to it (around the time Home aired, iirc). And it just seemed to fit the picture, so I couldn't resist. ;)

And a weak spot to the show, to me, is how slow the build up can be (sometimes, too slow) and how fast the resolution is in result. At least this week we got lots of hands on Dean throughout the episode. *bg*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:28 am (UTC)

It is a perfect song for the boys. And even I wouldn't mind breaking into song on that one...

And I agree with you on the weak spot--the episodes build so well but I often find the climax and resolution a bit rushed and are usually the most unsatisfying. I noticed it a lot in this ep and CSPWDT--they just seem to cut out right when I want them to go into depth and it kind of drives me batty.

But they're just so PRETTY that I ultimately forget my complaints and go on my merry way :)

Posted by: x5vale (x5vale)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 10:49 pm (UTC)

Beautiful, the boys just need each other and they can feel better only being together.

Thanks!

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:02 am (UTC)

I figure all they have going for them is their unity--it's the last thing they have, and the only thing that will keep them going.

Thanks :)

Posted by: Charli (mrscutedean)
Posted at: October 29th, 2006 11:05 pm (UTC)

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Faye you wrote it wahoooooooo Limp Sam forever baby. This was awesome and I agree with Kaly it would be nice to see the guys gather themselves or regroup instead of a rush to the conclusion we often get.

Great job hun!

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:04 am (UTC)
limpified

I too would love to see more scenes like this actually played out--because they have to happen when they're all beat up from a hunt. But we always get the edited version which just isn't as much fun.

But, like I told kaly, it keeps me writing, so it can't be ALL bad...

And I'm so glad you liked it...I like keeping the limp!Sam girls contented :)

Posted by: sleeping with my peepers open (javajunkie13)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 01:41 am (UTC)
spn :: brothers

Oh, I really like this, and it fits into the episode so nicely. I loved the revelation of Sam's fears and what it means to Dean. Very lovely. :)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: October 30th, 2006 02:04 am (UTC)

I'm so glad you liked it! I do feel that Sam's fears haven't truly been voiced yet, and to some extent, I think if Dean heard Sam's fears, it would help anchor him--give Dean a reason to live, if only to protect his brother.

Thanks!

Posted by: nativestar (nativestar)
Posted at: September 4th, 2007 02:46 pm (UTC)

Definately one for the limp!Sam fans! A great combination of angst and guilt, it not only draws on the events of Simon Said but previous episodes making this fit in perfectly as a missing scene. Thanks.

I'm doing a Simon Said fic rec on spn_epific and I'd like to include this there.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: September 7th, 2007 11:33 pm (UTC)
heres the thing

I'm always trying to help out the limp!Sam crowd :)

Thanks!

Posted by: harrigan (harrigan)
Posted at: December 3rd, 2009 03:01 am (UTC)
I've got you

I hope you don't read this till Thursday! I've decided to celebrate birthdays by picking a fic to re-read! And I know I've never commented on this here (though I hope I did at that other place!)

Simon Said is one of my favorite eps - and how could it not be with Sam in a cast and so much wincing! *g* I always felt it was a turning point in season 2 - before the episode Dean was so mired in grief at losing his Dad and suspecting why, that he really was oblivious to Sam's pain. But this episode reminded Dean that he has a brother who needs him, and it was a joy to watch Dean fall back into big brother mode.

So I *really* enjoyed seeing you shine a spotlight on that whole development, and expand on it a little. And you always do that so well!

The ending was particularly poignant now, re-reading it while season 5 is under way. They would never be ready for what was to come, just as they hadn't been ready for anything that had happened. But he and Sam were together now--together and alive--and somehow that was all he needed, all Sam needed to fight the burden of destiny that loomed before them.

I think that just might be coming true again!

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: December 3rd, 2009 07:35 pm (UTC)
hope2

Aw, that is a lovely idea for birthdays. And it is much appreciated that you did it for me :) It's nice to remember that not all of fandom drives me nuts!

I like your analysis of Simon Said. It's funny but I wasn't a huge fan of the ep when it first aired, but given how the show has been in recent seasons, I miss it terribly. You've made me nostalgic for it. I wish I could say I was as optimistic as you for its return.

Anyway, thanks so much :)

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