Log in

No account? Create an account
do i dare or do i dare? [userpic]

SPN Meta: Why Sam Winchester needs to be a hero

May 7th, 2009 (11:29 am)

I have never done this before.  My brain is not a logical or coherent place, so things like this are usually out of my league, or at least things I only do under duress and even then, I fret about them endlessly.  But, I've been thinking a lot about Sam and where he's at this season, and after talking extensively to geminigrl11 , I ended up writing this.  Meta is the only word I know to classify it, and I have no idea why anyone would care, but darn it, Sam needs to be understood!

So, my thinky-thoughts on the topic of Sam in season four, and how he got to this place, and why if anyone deserves to be a hero, it's him.

Okay.  So Sam Winchester can be kind of a controversial topic.  It’s not secret that I’m a pretty avid Sam girl, and my friends can tell you how much I’ve ranted and waxed poetic on the topic of Sam Winchester.  But as the season comes to a close and we’re seeing Sam slip further into darkness, I’m becoming increasingly worried that there will be a lack of sufficient redemption for his character.

When I say redemption, I’m talking about more than Sam realizing he’s wrong.  I want to see more for Sam than a humble apology about how much he’s screwed up.  Because, when I think about that, while Sam DOES owe the people around him some apologies, if that is all there is to Sam’s arc this season, then I’m very worried about Sam, which I’ll get to later.

I’ve also seen a lot of talk about Sam’s actions and how evil or not they may be.  I myself don’t think Sam’s evil, but rather think he’s trying to do the best he can.  Essentially, I see Sam as a very broken man trying to do something right for the first time in a long time.

Now that’s really not to say that I think Sam’s being a morally upstanding guy at the moment.  Quite the opposite.  For the first time in his life, he’s really getting his hands dirty, which I think is largely the point.  If you look at Sam’s life and the formative moments over the last couple of years, it makes total sense why Sam could go this route.

After all, Sam’s life is one formed by failure.  More than that, it is failure that comes from Sam’s decision to do what is “right.”  When I sat down and really thought about the major events of Sam’s recent years, it formed a rather disturbing pattern that seemed rather suggestive of why he’s decided to forgo the moral path altogether.

For this purpose, I’ll outline what I think to be the four most formative moments in Sam’s character over the course of the show.

1.  College.  I’m sure some people will disagree with me on this one, but Sam’s decision to go to college was Sam’s first major decision in his life.  It was the first time that Sam was forced to make a hard choice, and he did what he thought he had to do.  What he thought was right.  Sam believed (right or wrong, this is not the issue right now) that he needed to carve out his own path in life, that he had to do what made him happy.  It was clear that at 14, hunting made Sam miserable and desolate.  Sam made the choice to do what he needed to do in order to preserve his own sense of self worth: he went to college, and considering the ultimatum leveled at him and the issues from the fallout, I highly doubt it was an easy choice or one that Sam didn’t regret from time to time.  However, Sam made it, he stuck to it, and he flourished in it.

For awhile, anyway.  Until the YED revisits Sam’s life and takes his girlfriend in a tragic way which Sam not only had to witness, but realized he was responsible for on many levels (the dreams, not telling her the truth, etc.).  Basically, Sam was forced to face the fact that his great stand of self determination, was a disaster, something we see him acknowledging painfully in this season’s Jump the Shark.  Sam’s decision to figure out who he was, his decision to make his own life, backfired in a traumatic and deadly way.

2.  Putting family first.  Sam learned and grew a lot in S1, and his emotional arc came to a head when he had the chance to exact revenge and kill the YED, but at the expense of his father’s life.  Dean, who is bleeding in the background, asks Sam not to shoot and Sam, despite his father’s orders and Sam’s own desire to end it, realizes the value of family that Dean has always inherently understood.  Sam made his stand, put family ahead of his own need for vengeance, and it seemed like a fitting cap to his growth that season.

However, as a result of that action, Dean is nearly killed in a car accident and his father is forced to make a deal to save Dean’s life, leading to feelings of inadequacy that haunt Dean still.  More than that, it left Sam no chance to make things right with his father, who he believed died thinking Sam hated him, and it set an incredible burden on his brother which led to a year’s worth of extra heartache.  Since John gave up his life anyway, Sam probably could not help but wonder if he would have been better off killing his father in the first place, and thus avoiding a lot of the angst that would befall them in the coming seasons.

3.  Refusing to give in at Cold Oak.  This one breaks my heart the most.  Sam feared all season about his destiny.  When push came to shove, he had every chance in the world to give into the YED’s plan for him and kill Jake.  In some ways, it would have been the smart thing, since Jake was clearly out to kill him.  However, Sam valued controlling his own destiny and not playing into the hands of the YED far more than saving his own life, and decided to spare Jake.  To me, this is the quintessential moment for Sam in regards to his destiny.  Where he faced it and turned away.  It cost him his life but very well saved his soul.

That said, his decision and death had terrible consequences when Dean gave up his life in a deal.  Sam was then faced with the fact that if he’d given in and killed Jake, he could have prevented his brother’s death and subsequent trip to Hell.

4.  Not allying with Ruby in S3.  This one is not quite as cut and dry, I think, but the pattern still stands.  Once Ruby tells him she has a way to save Dean, Sam is clearly interested--no matter what and even though Ruby is a demon.  It is Dean who holds Sam back a lot in this one, wanting his brother to retain his goodness.  Sam heeds Dean’s wishes, sometimes reluctantly and by force, and does not end up working with Ruby.  The obvious result occurs: Dean goes to Hell, fulfilling the deal for Sam’s life.

Now, we don’t know for sure if Ruby could have helped Sam save Dean, but we know from this season that she seems to want to help Sam kill Lilith and with her blood, seems to have the means to accomplish this.  Presumably, if they had started that training earlier, Sam might have defeated Lilith prior to Dean’s deal coming due and thus saving his brother’s life.  But because Sam agreed to put his own goodness/morality over Dean’s life, he lost his brother, to Hell, no less.

These are four huge events in Sam’s life all culminating in four devastating losses for Sam in the aftermath.  And, it is important to note, that the consequences for Sam’s choice to do the “right” thing have NEVER been limited to Sam himself.  When he made his stand to go to college, he got Jessica killed.  When he agreed not to kill his father, Dean nearly ended up dying and their dad sold his soul and left his brother in a horrifically awful mental state.  When he didn’t give in to the YED’s plans at Cold Oak, he not only lost his life, but his brother ended up selling his soul and damned himself to Hell.  Then, by not working with Ruby to prevent Dean’s death, his brother was sent to Hell to be tortured for all eternity.

The first three major losses in Sam’s life, he managed to rally, thanks in a large part to the support of his brother.  There was always something left to cling to in that, always some hope that together they could make things better.  He was very nearly ready to compromise himself by allying with Ruby in order to prevent Dean from going to Hell, which shows just how desperate Sam was to NOT to fail at this.  Not only do the Winchester have a long history of self-sacrifice, but Dean was the last person Sam had left.  The possibility of losing him and facing a life without him--without anyone--would have been understandably more than Sam wanted to think about.  Dean himself didn’t last very long after losing Sam, which I think Sam understood, which was why I don’t think we saw a lot of anger from Sam after M7 in regards to Dean MAKING the deal.

Once Dean dies, and Sam has to face the fact that he failed again, resulting in his brother not only dying, but going to Hell, he goes off the map.  He runs away from Bobby and he tries every desperate and stupid thing he can to make it right--which essentially still an effort to fulfill the promise he made Dean when he first learned of the deal: to do anything possible to save Dean, which, not coincidentally is exactly what every other Winchester before him had done as well.  Basically, I think this failure broke Sam, leaving him nothing left to live for, which was only exacerbated by the fact that he had no positive examples of how to properly grieve and move on.  As a result, Sam had no purpose and no grounding, and we caught a glimpse of this in IKWYDLS.  It’s not straight up suicide, but I think it’s fair to say that he was looking for anyway to bite it without having to do it himself (Dean’s life was for his, after all--he wanted to live up to that in some way).

To me it seems likely that Sam’s reckless behavior would have achieved its ends at some point, which is why he’s right when he said Ruby saved his life.  Not because Ruby was his bestest friend ever, but because Ruby offered him something that no one else could:  the chance to do something right.  Not morally right, of course, but something that achieved results.  If he couldn’t bring Dean back, revenge was all he had left, and after years of playing by the rules and getting screwed, I think Sam just needed anything to exert some semblance of control over what was left of his life.

It wasn’t the best decision Sam ever made, but given his quasi-suicidal state, it is actually more of a coping device than a power-hungry choice.  Sam needed a reason to live, something that would give him agency--because after so many years of failure and for a guy who so wanted self determination, it is agency that he needs.  The blood drinkig, in all its ambiguity, fit the bill. 

More than that, all of his previous objections meant nothing to him anymore.  Doing the “right” thing, being morally pure--all that has EVER gotten Sam was loss and grief and pain.  Sam was a man with nothing left to lose.  So letting Ruby teach him to hone his gifts was actually a very logical thing for him to do.  Not a good thing, really, considering the uncertainty of their effect over Sam’s soul/body.  But logical.  And Sam, at his core, is a pretty methodical guy.  The fact that it took him so many failures to finally realize that being the good guy sucks is a testament to the strength of Sam’s moral code and integrity.

Also, as kind of an aside, this is also why I dislike the notion that Sam somehow didn’t live up to Dean’s sacrifice.  As much as there was love in Dean’s decision to make the deal, it doomed Sam to experience the worst failure in a long string of failures, exacerbated even more severely by a failed year long quest to prevent it.  Dean needed to believe at the end that Sam could move on, for his own closure.  However, Sam was already desperate, as evidenced by his willingness to compromise himself with Ruby prior to Dean’s death, and Sam had no other support system in place.  He had nothing to fall back on.  The only other time Sam was left completely on his own was when he left for Stanford, however, at that point in Sam’s life, he had something very important:  hope.  As Sam’s life has been repeatedly hit with blow after blow, Sam clearly believes himself cursed, and is utterly devoid of hope, no matter what meager faith he may have had at that point.  Without the hope for a meaningful future, Sam had no reason to cope or move on at all--no method to achieve that.  In short, I am amazed that Sam’s alive and functioning at all.  Lesser men would have killed themselves.  Sam’s survival is remarkable in and of itself. 

This is the stuff of severe psychological trauma and just because the show didn’t choose to show us much does not mean we should assume it isn’t real.  Sam’s ability to hunt and function in a seemingly normal manner is not necessarily suggestive that he got over it.  If he was over it, he wouldn’t still want Lilith’s head on a plate, nor would we see Sam going ahead with Ruby again and giving such nihilistic speeches.  It is also interesting to note when Sam started back with Ruby--after Dean basically shoots down the barely budding hope Sam had of ever moving on from hunting in CAIADB.  When this shred of hope is gone and Sam sees his life as an endless hunt that will probably cost him not only his life, but Dean’s, Sam is right back to where he was when Dean died emotionally, which is why he goes back to the familiar coping device.  The quest for revenge and using his powers to get there are Sam’s only method of controlling anything, thus being his only thing to cling to in the mess that is his life.

Now, what sucks, I think, is that even this decision, while giving him the ability to change things, doesn’t look to be shaping up any better than his other ones.  This is why I really hope, on some level, that Sam is right.  Not that being a demon blood addict is okay or that trusting demons is hunky-dory, but that his end goal of killing Lilith IS the right choice and that he DOES succeed in it.  Or, at the very least, that he has some significant role for the better in saving Dean and the world.  Because, honestly, if Sam doesn’t get a big damn hero moment that actually SAVES people and changes things FOR THE BETTER, I don’t know how Sam could feasibly recover psychologically.

I think Sam already hates himself--he knows the blood is wrong but I think he believes that the greater good is worth his soul, which is already tainted and worthless in his mind.  It would be a small price for a demon tainted soul to get a little dirtier, for a cursed person to seek our more condemnation.  But if he’s compromised everything he believes in, if he’s lost Dean’s trust, and it’s all for nothing, I just don’t see what hope there is for Sam.  This is not to say that Dean doesn’t have his own need for redemption this season, but I merely am putting this argument for Sam’s need to be the hero because I think it needs to be said.  Sam’s doing some morally ambiguous things this season.  But I don’t think Sam’s a bad guy.  I don’t think he’s evil.  I think he’s in over head his, but I would hate to see his entire struggle this year just be another way to knock his character down.  Realistically, Sam’s psyche is already too fragile to handle another blow, and, as a viewer, I am desperate to see Sam have his moment.


Posted by: pizzapixie (pizzapixie)
Posted at: May 7th, 2009 05:10 pm (UTC)

I completely agree with everything. He thinks he's destined for Hell so what does it matter? I'm not good enough to express what I feel about Sam. Thank goodness you are. Thank you.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 12:18 am (UTC)
meta limp

I hate how some people in fandom don't have the desire to understand Sam at all. To reduce him to a monster doesn't do him justice at all--and the notion that he needs to learn his flaws is so naive. Sam's a guy who already KNOWS his flaws, better than anyone. It's time for him to win for once.

(Deleted comment)
Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 12:19 am (UTC)
more brothers

I feel a little better after last week's ep, actually, but how it resolves will be a make or break. Right now I feel like both boys are right as they are wrong, which would give Sam's POV some credibility. I guess we'll have to see what the finale has in store. I'm being naive enough to hope for the first time all season.

Posted by: Moogs (moogsthewriter)
Posted at: May 7th, 2009 06:10 pm (UTC)
SPN - Sam breathless

Yes. YES. YES.

I agree with this 100 percent. I think one reason why people don't always agree with this view is because they forget about that 4 months that Sam had to survive on his own (which is why I had to write a fic about the aftermath). Yes, Dean's 40 years were absolutely horrible, but he should remember how desperate he was to save Sam, and Sam was dead for (at most) a few days. So really, for Sam to make the choices he did makes the most sense to me for his character.

And I also agree with your fear that they won't give Sam his moment. My implicit trust in Kripke & Co.'s talent give me the hope that Sam will turn out alright in the end, even if he dies, because he'll have had his chance to participate in the family business and actually save people instead of inadvertently killing them. And I haven't seen the last few eps, so I don't know exactly how things are looking for him, but I still hope. That might be naivete on my part, but I'll take that for the moment.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 12:21 am (UTC)
scarred for life

I think the writers have done Sam a disservice this season overall by choosing to make him "mysterious" instead of giving him substantial character development. Because the trauma Sam's been through, when I really think about it, makes his actions so understandable. To the point where I think Sam's doing remarkably well and I don't understand where people actually see him as a straight up monster and not a tragic hero.

I must say, if Sam doesn't get his moment, I don't know if I can watch S5. Which, would make me sad, but Sam's character NEEDS this. After last week, I'm allowing myself to hope a bit, but the finale is huge for this.

We'll see. Thanks :)

Posted by: Moogs (moogsthewriter)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 12:31 am (UTC)

Posted by: Dani (pinkphoenix1985)
Posted at: May 7th, 2009 07:49 pm (UTC)

Faye- this sums up everything perfectly! and I agree 10000000% with everything!

I share your fear that the writers won't give Sam his moment including more of the emotional fallout which I feel that we need to see some more of and we were cheated out of it. I really hope that whatever happens in the next two episodes- they have Sam dealing with it and not have him just being cool with everything. We got it from Dean and now it's Sam's turn.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 02:06 pm (UTC)
father's love

Everything hinges on tonight. I'm somewhat optimistic, but still really really scared.


Posted by: Dani (pinkphoenix1985)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 05:12 pm (UTC)

Posted by: sothereyougo (sothereyougo)
Posted at: May 7th, 2009 09:35 pm (UTC)
You so messed with my laptop

Absofreakin'positively!! *rude, frenzied cursing on your LJ warning* *seriously is okay with it if you want to delete my comment for bad language, but can't restrain self out of rampant dread and worry* You know what metaphorically keeps me up at night? My fears let me show you them: Sam will defy and lose everyone and everything he ever believed in to go and successfully kill Lilith but doing so comprises the breaking of the 66th seal and thus frees Lucifer.

So would that be tragic hero shi* on an epic fu**ing literal Greek tragedy scale? Well, yeah, but I don't want Sam to be fu**ing Oedipus, okay? *no slash pun intended* Like you, I'm okay with him tainted and damaged, even though it hurts like crazy, as long as he can turn out to be an actual hero, not a completely doomed one.

If tragic hero is the way Show goes, then I desperately hope they follow that up by being smarter than fu**in' Sophocles *again with the not-a-slash-pun idea* to come up with some way to redeem Sam from it. If they do, then I will gladly have all of their babies because I will be that pleased and impressed.

Worse still would be to have Sam fail completely and be utterly dependent on Dean to save him.

Woe is us until we find out.

P.S. NONE of this is meant to reflect negatively on Dean as a character in ANY way. I am referring only to what the writers choose to do with Sam as a character, as in if they decide Sam must fall on his a**, well then naturally I would prefer that Dean or somebody save him from eternal damnation. It just sure as shi* ain't my first choice.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 02:05 pm (UTC)
never alone

LOL! I used to teach high school students. I'm pretty used to excessive profanity and at least yours has better context.

And you're right: the worst case scenario to me is Sam failing completely and Dean having to save him completely. I'm okay with both boys realizing they're morons and saving each other, but if this entire season is a build up of Dean = right, Sam = wrong, I will break something. Sam's character deserves more than that. He needs more than that.

I hope they don't screw this up!!!!

Thanks :)

Posted by: piratelf (piratelf)
Posted at: May 8th, 2009 11:05 am (UTC)

Complete agreement!

I was SO upset at the end of season 3 when they didn't give Sam the chance to save Dean and live up to his words, "You're my brother, there is nothing I wouldn't do for you." and "If we're going down, we're going down together."

But that was nothing compared to how upset I was that they didn't even let Sam be the one to get Dean out of hell!

They keep showing Dean making sacrifices for Sam, then continually take away Sam's opportunities to repay that sacrifice! It's not fair and I feel it leads people to see Dean as selfless and Sam as selfish.

Until tonight's episode, I thought that one of the reasons that Sam was still going after Lilith was to make sure that Dean's contract was well and truly null and void. To save Dean from going back to hell. But they took that away as well. Now it's for revenge or justice, and of course to stop the end of the world. Why won't they LET Sam do something for Dean? And JUST for Dean? I wanted it to be made very clear that Sam is aware that he is sacrificing his own soul, but that ultimately he is doing it for Dean, to protect him! Because he is putting Dean's soul ahead of his own. Why can't it be that way?

I know that Sam is just as selfless and loyal as Dean is. And that he loves his family just as much. Why else would he have left school, before his big law school interview, to help Dean look for his Dad in the first place?

And Sam has had to deal with so much. He never asked for the nightmares, or the painful visions, or the freaky powers or the demon blood! Sam was the one who wanted most to be normal and he turns out to be the furthest one from it.

Sam was the believer. Sam prayed. But the angels choose Dean, and then are openly rude and hostile to Sam. This is beyond a crisis of faith!

Dean had to watch Sam die, once. Stabbed in the back.

Sam has had to watch Dean die hundreds of times. Each time he failed to prevent it. And many were gruesome, being crushed, hit by a car, and of course the final time when the hell hounds literally ripped Dean apart in front of Sam's eyes. These are big, major, traumatic things, but these experiences don't seem to be taken into account.

No one blames Dean for getting up off the rack after 30 years to torture others. I certainly don't. But Sam is blamed for listening to Ruby and taking the only course that he hasn't yet tried. And not just to stop his own suffering, but to bring Dean back from hell and therefore stop his brother's suffering as well.

Sam didn't give up on Dean in 'Faith'. And Sam didn't give up on Dean in IMTOD. And Sam didn't give up on Dean all during season 3. He is a good brother. And he does love Dean. I just wish they'd let him show it in a major, unconditionally heroic act, to make it clear to everyone.

Posted by: spaceseeker (spaceseeker)
Posted at: May 9th, 2009 04:21 am (UTC)

EDIT: "No one blames Dean for getting up off the rack after 30 years to torture others. I certainly don't. But Sam is blamed for listening to Ruby and taking the only course that he hasn't yet tried. And not just to stop his own suffering, but to bring Dean back from hell and therefore stop his brother's suffering as well. "


Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 02:03 pm (UTC)

Posted by: spaceseeker (spaceseeker)
Posted at: May 9th, 2009 04:20 am (UTC)

Well said. I agree completely. Sam needs vindication and a way out of the demon blood thing - he also needs Dean's approval. I think it's too much to hope for that he gets all three - thats why its so hard to watch the show at the moment.

BTW I love your banner - I wish I knew how to put one up on my LJ - I'm just a beginner

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 02:00 pm (UTC)

It is hard to watch--but he does need vindication. I'm barely hanging on to hope that he gets it.

I'm no LJ expert by any stretch of the imagination, but if you want help, I can offer my meager know-how. Banners aren't that complicated to get up.


Posted by: ivy_b (ivy_b)
Posted at: May 9th, 2009 10:57 am (UTC)

Wow, Faye this is quite a meta. I completely agree. If Sam doesn't get a win, if he doesn't in some small way get vindicated or helps stop the big A... I think he'll just take a gun and shoot himself in the head. This kid was anything but normal since before he was born and no matter how hard he tries to do the right thing, it gets him nowhere or others killed. Now he's trying to sacrifice himself to save the world and if he's wrong/accidently starts the big A/something twisty and evil, then I can't see him finding a reason to go on. Dean certainly made clear that family is not an option and that he thinks he's a monster (no I don't really think Dean thinks this, but Sam does) so this is a suicide run for Sam. No going back. *sobs*

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 01:59 pm (UTC)

Poor Sam--especially after last week, I feel like he doesn't really value his life/soul at all. I don't think he actually cares if he lives through this. What I don't get is why more people (and Dean, to some extent), don't see the utter depression that seems to have Sam locked down. He needs help, but way beyond a detox. I hope that he gets a chance to come out on top for once.


Posted by: jenni_fromtexas (jenni_fromtexas)
Posted at: May 10th, 2009 07:27 pm (UTC)
Sam using powers

I finally just had the chance to read this (I've got to get caught up with your fics too). I agree - endlessly - Sam is a tortured, unsung hero who desperately needs vindication. Thank you so much for this. :)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 01:57 pm (UTC)
after school limp

I really hated that they didn't give Sam a chance to save Dean--and I hate that the show didn't do justice to the depth of that failure. That's still driving Sam, and though many fans are clamoring for him to be wrong, I really feel like he deserves to have his moment to shine.

Thanks for commenting :)

Posted by: Amy (quarterwhore)
Posted at: May 10th, 2009 09:03 pm (UTC)
spn: life isn't fair [mystery spot]

YOU are my hero.

Sam's been through so much. Just because he didn't go to hell doesn't mean he hasn't gone through it. Personally, I think he's as lovable as ever, just in a different way. He's still SAM though, an it saddens me that so many people (including Dean!) don't see that. ♥

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 01:56 pm (UTC)

Aw, thanks! And yes--I feel like the show didn't do a great job of helping viewers realize how intense Sam's personal hell was, though I felt like last week's ep showed us a very, very sad and quasi-suicidal Sam--and that's not the demon blood talking. That's why Sam thinks the demon blood is worth it. I feel like his self worth is so low that to him, drinking demon blood can't really make him worse since he's already so low.

And he IS still Sam, even after last week, and I will believe that for always. If the show forgets that or overlooks it or doesn't bother to redeem him, I will be so sad :(

Thanks :)

Posted by: Shuttle Pilot Major C Cockles (clubinthesky)
Posted at: May 10th, 2009 09:43 pm (UTC)

...if Sam doesn’t get a big damn hero moment that actually SAVES people and changes things FOR THE BETTER, I don’t know how Sam could feasibly recover psychologically. Agreed, i want Sam to succeed so badly, i think it would be like closure to him, that he was able to something right, for Dean, the world around them. Interesting meta!

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 01:54 pm (UTC)
doe eyed

Yes, closure. Exactly. I know a lot of people say that Sam needs to fall flat on his face, but I feel like the poor kid has been rubbed in the dirt enough in the grander scheme of the show. He was denied the hero moment in S2 and S3. It's his turn.


Posted by: zippy02 (zippy02)
Posted at: May 11th, 2009 02:07 pm (UTC)

Yes! to every point you make here.

I desperately want Sam to get that hero moment he so deserves. I have my doubts it will happen, but I take solace in the fact that I am not alone in my Sammy adoration! :)

Thanks for sharing this great meta. ~Shelby

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 14th, 2009 01:53 pm (UTC)

I have my doubts, too, but for the first time, I'm letting myself hope all season. Kripke will probably make me regret that, but I'm insufferable. This hellish season (no pun intended) has to be worth something for us Sam girls, otherwise, what's the point?


Posted by: Blahbaby (blahbaby)
Posted at: May 15th, 2009 11:49 pm (UTC)

Reading this now after the finale, it's interesting. Taking it all into account now and how it all ends, it seems like Sam is just a victim of his destiny. It's like he can't fight fate, whether he tries to do what's right or when he starts going into the murky gray area, it doesn't matter. What's supposed to happen, happens in Sam's case. Even when he dies he gets brought back so he can still do what he's meant to.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 16th, 2009 12:21 am (UTC)
find me

You know, I'm inclined to believe you. In some ways, to me, that's Sam's only out in all of this. When you look at the evolution of it, Sam never had a chance, even when it seems like he did, even when all he wanted was to do the right thing, even when all he wanted was a say in his own destiny. Perhaps it is Dean who is wrong: you can't fight destiny. Not even when Castiel and Dean broke from Chuck's story, it still ended up the same way.

Ugh, I just want Sam to have his freakin' hero moment. But I'm just having a terrible time seeing it.

(Pretty icon, btw. Also, seeing as I've stalked you for the better part of the afternoon, mind if I friend?)

Posted by: Blahbaby (blahbaby)
Posted at: May 16th, 2009 12:54 am (UTC)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: May 16th, 2009 01:40 am (UTC)

Posted by: Blahbaby (blahbaby)
Posted at: May 16th, 2009 02:55 am (UTC)

Posted by: dangomango (dangomango)
Posted at: October 21st, 2009 03:34 pm (UTC)

I friended you for this AND for your stories. It's refreshing to find Supernatural fans on LJ who THINK, which is an asshole thing to say BUT it's how I feel.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: November 3rd, 2009 07:51 pm (UTC)
bloody hero

I am hopelessly behind on replying to things, but I'm kind of amazed you even found this! That said, I'm glad you liked the insight. Sometimes I think I think too much, so it's always reassuring when people agree with me :)


Posted by: zaphael_firefly (zaphael_firefly)
Posted at: January 31st, 2011 06:51 am (UTC)

I liked how you broke down the major decisions and the moments (hinge pins) in Sam's existence.

Sam is a complex character, I understand and empathize with him more than any other character on the show. (Younger sibling have to stick together ;D)

I've just found your LiveJournal and am now reading your metas, because I absolutely adore you as an author.

People tend to look at Sam's decision to leave for college as an abandonment of Dean. Really? You're supposed to give up all your dreams because your older sibling is too co-dependent to cut the apron strings?

Cold Oak was a testament of how much Sam was willing to sacrifice to do what he knew was right, he may have died, for it but Dean's deal that was on Dean, people tend to look at it as something Dean did for Sam when it couldn't have been farther from the truth. Dean made the deal for himself and everything that followed was the aftermath of that.

Season 3 was the beginning of Sam's frantic tailspin to find a way to save his brother and Dean scratching his ass wondering why Sam wasn't the Sammy he knew. (If that Sammy ever existed at all) All I could think was really? You don't have a clue Dean? Mother, Father, girlfriend/fiance (she would have said yes) and now his brother is going to die 'because of Sam'. Still no clue?

Season 4 was just painful to watch, Sam's 'fall' was orchestrated on all sides, people failed to see that as much as Sam 'chose' Ruby, Dean chose the Angels that he didn't even trust over his own brother. While Sam may have 'chosen a demon' over his brother, but at least he trusted his bed mate.
Personally I didn't see Sam so much choosing Ruby over Dean, Sam was taking care of the threat that he knew Dean (despite Dean's saber rattling) wasn't able to take care of and the greater good over his brother's feelings.Hope I'm making sense.

Great meta looking forward to reading your other ones.

34 Read Comments