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do i dare or do i dare? [userpic]

Chaos fic: A General Dislike

July 4th, 2011 (07:46 pm)
Tags: ,

Title:  A General Dislike

Disclaimer:  Not mine.

A/N:  For eviinsanemonkey  and her prompt for Casey-centric angst.  Small spoilers for Deep Cover Band.  Also, unbeta’ed so beware of typos.

Summary:  Casey won’t deny that he has a general dislike for mankind.

-o-

Casey won’t deny that he has a general dislike for mankind.

After all, people are difficult.  There are the bad guys, who run around wreaking havoc on the world for their own nefarious purposes and selfish ambitions.  He understands indulging oneself with basic needs and interests--there is something essentially valuable in hedonism, as far as he’s concerned--but the world can’t function if people pursue their own ends at the expense of others, so yes, he carries a certain abhorrence for those who use pain and fear and illegal measures to accomplish their means.  It makes life a whole lot more difficult for everyone else, especially Casey, who has to clean up their messes for them.

But it’s not just bad guys.  It’s the good guys, too.  Spies are difficult in their own right.  All their sneaking and lying--Casey understands it since he lives and breathes it--but the vast majority of them just aren’t that good at it.  They’re too sloppy or too stupid or just too generally annoying.  It’s not an easy thing to maintain sanity in this line of work, and those that cross the lines to all kinds of craziness tend to make his life unduly complicated.  He either has to worry about pulling them out of compromising situations or about being pulled into compromising situations on their behalf.  Too many spies lack the self discipline to be worth their mettle in the field, which is why he certainly can’t object to the quasi-minimum wage that the government doles out for most of their mediocre services.

And of course, there’s foreign spies.  Some of these are his enemies and some of these are supposedly his allies and mostly it all just gives Casey a headache.  Because they’re just as sloppy as the Americans and he can’t even justify their presence by the backing of a Constitution that has a shred of integrity.  He could really do without them in the grander scheme of things, even more than the bad guys of the world, which is saying something.

There are also the civilians to consider.  So called innocents.  Not that Casey thinks they are inherently guilty of actual crimes, but the crime of ignorance is almost just as bad in Casey’s eyes.  All the pointless toil, all their stupid beliefs--it’s almost as infuriating as illegal activity.  Worse, in some ways, because they should know better.  Everyone should know better.  They should realize that the world is a scary and dark place, with dangerous and frightening people.  They shouldn’t expect their government to solve their problems and fix their lives: that’s their own personal responsibility and sometimes Casey resents that they’ve continually and willingly foisted it off on others while bitching and moaning like a whiny toddler in need of a good spanking and a nap.

So in this light, it’s really rather easy to maintain a general dislike of mankind.  There’s not much likable about them all, so it’s almost paradoxical that somehow they’re still worth saving.  Because this world produces idiots, but it also makes heroes.  For every criminal, there’s a selfless government agent, willing to do anything and everything for the greater good.

And that means there is a greater good.  Casey doesn’t think about it often, but it’s an implicit truth in his world view.  It has to be.  Otherwise, his job is as pointless as the rest and he might as well go off and join the criminal and at least get rich during his struggles on this earth.  But there’s a bigger picture, a higher order--and countless people who fit into it that need to be saved.  Casey needs a greater good to fight for, and he needs to fight for the greater good.

It helps to think about the people who do matter, when all is said and done.  After all, there are some sterling examples of what a person should be that he holds onto when things gets especially rough.

There are people like Michael, who wants to save the world for all the right reasons and who has a heart of gold that gets lost in the skepticism he can’t help but harbor after all he’s seen.  There are people like Billy, who acts like he’s in it for his own wayward fancies, but who cares more than any of them to keep doing this not for the country of his birth but for the only one that will have him after all that he’s been through.  There are people like Fay and Adele and even Higgins or Blank, who use the system for good, who fight the good fight simply because that’s what has to be done.

And there are people like Rick, who shows up wide eyed and believe in every promise the government makes, who fights for the honor of the people who would spit in his face, who represents everything that might be good about the present and the future.

These people are worth it.  They may be the only thing right in a messed up world.  And Casey thinks, if there’s a few of them, then logically, there must be more.  Even if Casey hasn’t met them yet, and that’s why he has to do what he does.  That’s why what he does is important.  That’s why it scares the hell out of him to think that he might not be able to do his job.  Because if Casey can’t save this people, he can’t save anyone, and if he can’t save anyone, then the entire world is going to go to pot, and then there’s going to be nothing left at all.

This is why Casey trains and Casey fights and Casey does the job that no one else wants to do.  He takes his government paycheck and he deals with the bad guys and overlooks the spies and fights for the people he knows are worth it.  This is why he can’t compromise anything, this is why sacrifices are worth it.  Because there is a greater good even if Casey can’t always see it, but others can, and that’s really good enough for him.

So Casey won’t deny that he has a general dislike for mankind, mostly because he doesn’t know how to admit that such a thing might not be as entirely true as he wants everyone to believe.

Comments

Posted by: lukadreaming (lukadreaming)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 09:32 am (UTC)
Casey

Excellent look at Casey's motives (and at the rest of the team!)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 11:52 am (UTC)
CHAOS team

I like to think that while Casey puts on the the most off-putting front that inside he's probably softer than the rest of them :)

Thanks!

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 11:46 am (UTC)
Chaos: Casey

oh, this is perfect. It's a great look at Casey and how he looks at the world and his team.

(you're up :D)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:10 pm (UTC)
chaos team 2

Thanks :)

(My brain keeps coming up with Billy prompts, but I'll offer you some variety--or try to anyway :) How about just the song lyric: you can't always get what you but if you try sometimes you might just find you get what you need. You can focus on whoever you want.)

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:15 pm (UTC)
Chaos: Team

(I don't mind Billy prompts, lol. All right, I'll see what I can come up with...it may be angsty...)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:17 pm (UTC)
billy earnest

(I just feel redundant sometimes, especially since too many of them involve whump. And I do approve of angst of all varieties :)

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:19 pm (UTC)
Chaos: Casey

(whumping Billy is fun, though...)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:23 pm (UTC)
billy approves

(LOL, then by all means, have at it. I have wanted to see a drowned!Billy at some point...)

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:29 pm (UTC)
Chaos: Casey/Billy

(well, my mind has already latched onto some Fay/Michael angst, but I can do drowned!Billy, too...hmmm)

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:31 pm (UTC)
billy content

(Go with whichever you're drawn to--after more episodes, I can get behind Fay/Michael pretty solidly. LOL, there's always the next round of prompting to consider :)

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:32 pm (UTC)

(we shall see where my mind goes. hee, that's true :P)

Posted by: Evil Insane Monkey (eviinsanemonkey)
Posted at: July 7th, 2011 11:56 am (UTC)

here you go!

(sorry these keep taking me so long lately, my mind keeps jumping fandoms like crazy)

Posted by: blackdog_lz (blackdog_lz)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 11:54 am (UTC)

Casey's mind is a dark, pessimistic place and you managed to get that across in a really believable way.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 12:10 pm (UTC)
billy watches

Casey isn't probably the character I'd write about most naturally, but I admit, he's fascinating when I do :)

Posted by: nietie (nietie)
Posted at: July 5th, 2011 02:56 pm (UTC)
Chaosketeers

A great look at Casey's inner thoughts. Cynical, but caring at the same time. Very in-character.

Posted by: do i dare or do i dare? (faye_dartmouth)
Posted at: July 6th, 2011 01:29 am (UTC)
billy earnest

Cynical but caring seems like a good summary of Casey :)

Thanks!

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